Nickname: Sven
A comet since: 2004
Abode: Kentish Town
Other hobbies: car racing, wife hunting
Claim to fame: Once played blackjack in Vegas with Drew Barrymore
Favourite player: Tony Adams
Team supported: Arsenal
Suggestion to improve football: deport Mourinho and lock up the Russian

Nickname: Sho
Playing position: left wing
A comet since: 1999
Abode: Clapham
Other hobbies: films food and friends
Claim to fame: Was once on "Trisha"
Favourite player: The buck toothed wonder that is Ronaldhino
Team supported: agnostic
Suggestion to improve football: players caught diving should be made to wear stabilisers for 3 matches afterwards
Coach's comment: Captain Power. Good strong name. And a surprising level of understanding of the beautiful game for someone so Welsh.

Nickname: Barn Door
Playing position: Right wing
A comet since: 2005
Abode: Everybody lives in Clapham
Other hobbies: Work. Sad sad world.
Claim to fame: If I had one would I be playing for the Comets? Just asking
Favourite player: Sally Dixon
Team supported: Arsenal
Suggestion to improve football: Make managerial fur coats compulsory
Coach's comment:

Nickname: Sal
Playing position: striker
A comet since: 2003
Abode: Oval
Other hobbies: cricket, choral singing, crosswords, fancy dress, scavenging
Claim to fame: Was once invited to sit on Derek Randall's knee
Favourite player: Steven Gerrard
Team supported: Liverpool
Suggestion to improve football: scrap the 'interfering with play clause' in the offside rule
Coach's comment: Karaoke Queen, centre forward extraordinaire, slide tackles not to be messed with, penchant for swimming in Swedish rivers after dark

Nickname: Nic
Playing position: somewhere near the front
A comet since: 2005
Abode: sw london
Other hobbies: music (playing, listening), reading ( mostly fiction), sport in general, travel
Claim to fame: peter andre winked at me once
Favourite player: ronaldinho
Team supported: arsenal
Suggestion to improve football: make the goal mouth a bit bigger
Coach's comment: Better than Drogba, though thankfully nowhere near as cocky deceitful or odd looking.

Nickname: Hazey P, Reply All
Playing position: midfield
A comet since: 2006
Abode: battersea, london
Other hobbies: Tea, music, running, dancing, skiing, travelling, laughing at stuff, good red wine, dim sum
Claim to fame: Brian Lara danced in my lap one New Year .
Favourite player: Ee-laine Penrose (aka "Penrose")
Team supported: Not chelsea
Suggestion to improve football: Refs being stricter on bad manners and unlady-like behaviour. It's not cool.
Coach's comment: Can do things with her hands few can even dream of. Her feet aren't bad either.

Nickname: The Dutchess
Playing position: number 1
A comet since: 2010
Abode: Battersea
Other hobbies: skiing, food, travelling, good wine, film
Claim to fame: The ugly guy from the black eyed peas staged dived at a concert i was at, but his foot landed on my face so to make up for it he thought it would be appropriate to kiss me. Hence, i was kissed by one of the black eyed peas.
Favourite player: Sneider
Team supported: Ajax
Suggestion to improve football: to take it a little less serious
Coach's comment:

Nickname: Sheila
Playing position: Centre back
A comet since: 2010
Abode: battersea
Other hobbies: sock folding and linen ironing
Claim to fame: I once might have seen one off the actors from the Bill in the flesh at trafalgar square. Probably.
Favourite player: John Mckain
Team supported: still decising
Suggestion to improve football: send mcgrumpy in to sort them out!
Coach's comment:

Nickname: Bambinho
Playing position: Left back
A comet since: 2010
Abode: Central
Other hobbies: Basketball, snowboard
Claim to fame: sed to be a child model for Chicco Toys
Favourite player: Fabio Cannavaro
Team supported: Forza Italia!
Suggestion to improve football: Better weather and less mud
Coach's comment:

Nickname: Sonaldinho
Playing position: Striker
A comet since: 2004
Abode: Parsons Green
Other hobbies: drinking alcohol,reading and painting
Claim to fame: Bend It Like Beckham
Favourite player: Steven Gerrard
Team supported: Liverpool FC
Suggestion to improve football: make it compulsory
Coach's comment: Aaaaah Trigger (as in Only Fools and Horses). Famed for scoring lots of goals, having lovely chats with the opposition centre back on the half-way line, flirting with her boss, and forgetting the scoreline.

Nickname: Ratters
Playing position: Midfielder
A comet since: 2007
Abode: Clapham
Other hobbies: Eating out, films
Claim to fame: Awarded a prize for a colouring in competition in primary school by Chris Packman from The Really Wild Show
Favourite player: I don't really have one but if forced to name one, probably Paul Scholes
Team supported: Manchester United
Suggestion to improve football: more matches!
Coach's comment: Makes Cristiano look like a slow old clumsy ugly donkey. My tip for player of the season, in her DEBUT season.

Nickname: Ed
Playing position: "DEFENSE!"
A comet since: 2007
Abode: out East in the boonies
Other hobbies: anything goes
Claim to fame: George Clooney said hi
Favourite player: David Beckham for a number of obvious reasons......
Team supported: would rather play
Suggestion to improve football: allow full-on rugby tackles
Coach's comment: I can't pronounce her name and I can't understand what she says. Apart from that, she's great.

Nickname: Penrose
Playing position: Midfield
A comet since: 1998 - The original founding Comet. She set it up.
Abode: Clapham
Other hobbies: Liverpool FC, the Lovellies, snowboarding, (scuba..) diving, tea, other beverages
Claim to fame: Ian Rush once tried to snog me...
Favourite player: Stevie G
Team supported: Liverpool YNWA
Suggestion to improve football: height restriction
Coach's comment: Used to be feisty then she got all loved up and smoochy and hasn't bitten anyone since. Famous for the "you're a very very very very bad referee" yellow card incident.

Nickname: Arsenio
Playing position: Midfield
A comet since: 2008
Abode: Flat
Other hobbies: Hosting talk shows. Interest in waistcoats.
Claim to fame: Can actually run faster than a cheetah.
Favourite player: CD
Team supported: Engerlund
Suggestion to improve football:
Coach's comment: Just like Arsenal we've been wanting another rock in midfield. Think we may have found one...

Nickname: Damocles
Playing position: Midfield
A comet since: 2007
Abode: London
Other hobbies: Cheerleading
Claim to fame: Once scored from 40 yards out. The voices told her to do it.
Favourite player: Shona
Team supported: the Comets!
Suggestion to improve football: More cheers. Possibly cheerleaders.
Coach's comment: Will not stop running. Ever. Even when I ask her to. Like the f***ing Duracell bunny.

Nickname: Possibly Fergie, but definitely NOT Furry or Madame Furrypants!
Playing position: Midfield (come winger and...errmmm...striker?!)
A comet since: 2010
Abode: Clapham
Other hobbies: Hunting men...will have to reassess if/when I source a BF.
Claim to fame: Stripped for Zoo magazine in Oz...classy.
Favourite player: Stevie G
Team supported: Liverpool FC
Suggestion to improve football: How bout linesmen/linespeople(!) every now and then? You know, like the men get each week? Like, the other "officials" who assist the ref to control the match? That would be nice. Oh and generally raising the profile of women's football would be nice too
Coach's comment:

Nickname: Weedie / 'Weedie Tallariti' / 'Tallaweedie'
Playing position: Striker or central middie
A comet since: 2009
Abode: Battersea
Other hobbies: Any sport, cooking, traveling
Claim to fame: Um, erm...sometimes I spot Mr. Drogba coming in and out of my building of flats...for what purpose, no one knows!
Favourite player: Essien for his (effortless) skill and consistency; Rooney and DD for their heart of play
Team supported: Blue is the Colour
Suggestion to improve football: Salary caps (per team) for the men; get some of the great women int'l players to come over to England to play (WUSA, the US women's pro league, has failed 2x, as it doesn't have the financial backing of partnered men's teams. The WNBA (Women's National Basketball Association) in the US thrives because it does have that backing. Combine some more quality int'l players--from the US, Germany, Brazil--with the likes of financial support (which the women's English teams already have) and the league could be impressive, profitable, and inspiring for young English girls (or girls everywhere perhaps?!).
Coach's comment:

Nickname: DuVillionaire
Playing position: Left back...centre mid?
A comet since: 2011
Abode: Finsbury Park...the bench near the entrance
Other hobbies: Photography, taking the piss out of Howden, moustaches, Christopher Walken, general debauchery and hijinks
Claim to fame: Vinnie Jones eloquently questioned my sexuality. To this day I don't think he actually believes my answer.
Favourite player: Hugh Hefner. Oh...football player. I get it now
Team supported: I'm terrible at follwing sports. I can barely pay attention during games I'm actually playing in, much less any other team.
Suggestion to improve football: Quit diving and just get on with the game.
Coach's comment:

Nickname: Don't think I have one...
Playing position: Goalie
A comet since: 2011
Abode: Walthamstow London / Akranes Iceland
Other hobbies: Photography and baby making practice
Claim to fame: Met Pele and brought him flowers when he visited my football club in 1991, I got a kiss from him!
Favourite player: Ryan Giggs
Team supported: IA, Man Utd and The Comets
Suggestion to improve football: More female referees and assistants.
Coach's comment:

Nickname: Fi / Ona
Playing position: Centre Back / Right Back
A comet since: 2011
Abode: Limehouse
Other hobbies: Marathons, eating & more recently, booking flights to places I have never been whilst drunk.
Claim to fame: Once met Kevin Davies in a Wetherspoons in Covent Garden and blatantly ignored his 'not as good-looking' friend who tried to talk to me ...who I was later told was Jonathan Greening.
Favourite player: Michael Dawson - A hug from him is on my Bucket List
Team supported: Spurs
Suggestion to improve football: Impose a "Miss a shot, do a shot" rule
Coach's comment:

Nickname: don't think I've earned a Comets one yet, if cricket's anything to go by, it'll be Chewy soon enough
Playing position: left-back or striker. Just call me Leighton Odemwingie
A comet since: 2011
Abode: Holloway - the place not the prison
Other hobbies: cricket, music fascism, bourgeois food products, beer.
Claim to fame: Johnny Borrell from Razorlight misfielded off my bowling at Lord's.
Favourite player: Steven Gerrard, obviously
Team supported: Liverpool
Suggestion to improve football: at pro level sin bins, at our level refs that deign to turn up on time (or at all)
Coach's comment:

Nickname: tbc
Playing position: Centre back
A comet since: 2010
Abode: Limehouse
Other hobbies: Rugby, tennis, eating.
Claim to fame: I once shagged Alan Hanson at an airport.
Favourite player: Stevie Gerrard
Team supported: Liverpool
Suggestion to improve football: Rolling around on the floor clutching an ankle, face or other body part to be punishable by law
Coach's comment: .

Nickname: Baldie
Playing position: Occasional goalie/goal post
A comet since: 2010
Abode: Dans le Bush
Other hobbies: Frequenting nail bars and entering pie throwing competitions.
Claim to fame: Related to Edna O'Brien.
Favourite player: Liam "chipper" Brady
Team supported: Arsenal
Suggestion to improve football: All matches should be refereed by Brian Glover (or people who can impersonate him as he's dead) as Bobby Charlton in Kes - the finest piece of celluloid to depict football ever made
Coach's comment: .

Nickname: tbc
Playing position: Striker
A comet since: 2000
Abode: Borough
Other hobbies: Travelling
Claim to fame: "Er...watched Sal talk to Ross Kemp"
Favourite player: Steven Comets
Team supported: Nikki
Suggestion to improve football: More post-match beer
Coach's comment: Don't mess okay. Just don't.

Nickname: McP
Playing position: Defender
A comet since: 2000
Abode: Stepney
Other hobbies: Arsenal, running, knitting
Claim to fame: I've touched Freddie Ljungberg's knee (and I didn't faint)
Favourite player: Cesc Fabregas
Team supported: Arsenal
Suggestion to improve football: get stricter on diving
Coach's comment: She's blond, she's quick.... And she's a gooner. Even wear's Tony Adams No 6 shirt. Bless.

Nickname: "Uh, don't know"
Playing position: "Versatile...but for football, left back and keeper"
A comet since: 2005
Abode: Bankside
Other hobbies: "crochet, macrame, knitting....I like using my hands"
Claim to fame: "Wouldn't you like to know!"
Favourite player: Cesc Fabregas
Team supported: "Arsenal.....is there any other team?"
Suggestion to improve football: It's the perfect game - no improvements required
Coach's comment: One of 47 Canadians in this year's squad. Equally comfortable in goal, at left back, or sat in my seats at the Emirates.